An everythingist lifestyle comes with lots of stress and struggle. Here’s how to let go of FOMO and embrace a slower, calmer way of life.

If there are two things that define my generation, it’s FOMO and an Everythingist lifestyle. These are actually two sides of the same coin.
An Everythingist is someone who cannot commit, so they end up doing everything. They do it to soothe their FOMO (fear of missing out). This ultimately results in spreading themselves thin. They are stressed out from being so busy and unable to achieve as much success as they would if they had time to focus on one activity.
Everythingist and Everythingism.
There’s not a lot in the cultural lexicon about being an everythingist. However, there are references to Everythingism. This is mostly connected to the art of Natalia Goncharova, an early 19th-century artist who literally did all types of art, often mixing them together to create new forms of art.
Everythingist doesn’t even have that level of history. However, here is how I define an everythingist lifestyle:
- Taking on too many things (jobs, hobbies, and friendships) rather than cultivating a few activities and relationships.
- Not making choices about what you want to do because of FOMO.
- A sense of being so busy you can’t really relax or enjoy yourself.
- It is the opposite of self-care.
- If you feel like life is too much, it just might be because you are an everythingist.
How to combat FOMO:
At the risk of sounding like Mari Kondo, the secret to giving up an Everythingist lifestyle is to make choices.
- Making choices doesn’t mean giving up things you love. It means choosing what you are going to spend your time on right now.
- For new parents this is easy. Your whole world is focused around your baby. Everything else comes second. It doesn’t mean you have to give up on rock climbing, camping, or music festivals. It just means taking a break for a few years.
- It’s fine to have lots of passions and interests. But if you don’t have enough time for all of them you are selling yourself short. Choose the interests you enjoy the most right now. It’s fine to reassess and change your mind later.
Brad and I both struggle with making decisions. It quite literally took a pandemic for us to realize that we were over-scheduled.
Balancing Choice and Responsibility
My son, Max, taught me the most about choosing passions. He naturally gravitates to 2 or 3 passions. And he goes all in on those passions. These passions have changed throughout his childhood, but they are always deep and fulfilling. I honestly feel honored to watch him grow, first as a writer and musician, and now as a chess player. He’s always done a team sport, gladly giving 2 to 3 days a week to practice and skills development.
As adults, we aren’t always given the same amount of flexibility. Sometimes our time is dictated by the necessity of caring for our children or our older parents. But these sorts of responsibilities are fleeting. We harm ourselves when we spread ourselves thin.
For example, I would like to learn to play the guitar. However, I simply don’t have time. At the moment, I need to put my energy into my career and my children. The little bit of extra time I have goes toward participating in my community. But I know that at some point (probably sooner than I would like) my kids will leave home, and I will have time to practice the guitar.
If you find yourself overwhelmed by all the things you want to do, take a moment to sit with yourself and consider how you feel about all of these “optional” demands on your time.
- Do they Spark Joy? Or do they feel like things you would like to do in the future when you have time to fully focus on them.
- Do they feel like things you used to enjoy, but aren’t really fitting in with your life right now?
- Do they feel stressful (ahem, like my social media addiction)?
And if you’re still at a loss, remember, connecting with people you enjoy is always fulfilling. Focus on who you want to spend more time with rather than the activity.
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